Ek Kaidi aur Ek Hasina

For the entire week I was busy with work. I did not even have time to sip my coffee in peace. This was the busiest week of my entire career. Though the weekend gave some relief from work but today was Monday and tomorrow was the date for releasing the product. I was occupied with work, and things were not moving in right direction and in such critical situation I was swarmed by people who called me last on my last birthday. Just within the first hour of my office I had attended five and missed six calls and in parallel I was chatting with five other friends.

My cell phone rang and it was a call from an unknown number so I hung up. Again it rang displaying 9540611889 calling. I was too frustrated to take any further actions, I let it ring until it became a missed call. These BPO folks would not let you live in peace. It rang back and as I did not have luxury time to deviate my attention again and again, so I picked the call up to shout and ask him to stop harassing me. "Hiiiii" a girl screamed loud enough to make me deaf momentarily. A gal’s voice over phone reduces the level of mercury in mind. With soft voice I asked the caller’s name. Instead of giving a straight reply I heard "Do not you remember me?" In the moment of heat I asked myself “Who is this girl? Why did she call me? Why cannot she answer me straight? Did I ever promise a girl to remember her every second of my life?” Mercury was rising in outer and inner spaces but instead of showing my emotions I told her "Dude, if you want to have question/answer session, call me in the night. Right now I have much priority questions to answer". I was just about to cut the call, I heard “hey! this is Kamini”.

Kamini, I do not remember any Kamini, did we ever meet? I wanted to leave the CCD encounter behind but her name flashed the black day back to my mind. Kamini, speaking over the phone, was fluent in English so I dismissed my assumption. But she cleared my doubt and confirmed I was talking to Kamini ( Kareena Kapoor - Chameli > Kamini@CCD >Rakhi Sawant). "Arre Baap re." Did not I tell you about giving her my number to stay in touch (You know KIT)? In a slice of second, I started finding the reasons behind this call. Does she want to discuss date and time? Does she want to negotiate on price? Does she want to blackmail me? Did someone take our photos together? (I was still unmarried and my photo on walls will reach my village before me) These thoughts made me uneasy and instead losing my temper I managed to say "Hey, kaisi ho tum". Call ended with a promise to meet at Barista and My working spirit ended abnormally on the very moment I hung up the call. I dreamt myself on deathbed with no family around (Nagar Nigam folks were completing my last rites with following words - Logon ko shauk karne ho to khule mein nahi karne chahiye bechare ki shadi tak nahi hue ek chote se shauk ke chakkar mein).

I finished my work as soon as possible and reached Barista. She was wearing pink top on light blue jeans. There was little Kajal in her eyes, lips did not have any lipstick, nose did not have any stupid ring and there was very little makeup on her face. Precisely she was looking gorgeous and I was lost in her beauty.

In conversation she told that her real name was Shalini and she was pursuing her MA from Delhi University. I thought this girl had indulged in dirty business to fulfil her teenage desires. Anyway I was still unclear about the agenda of the meeting so a thought of trap was not allowing me enjoy her company.

Looking at my peculiar behaviour she figured out my intentions of not staying there for a longer time. She took my hands in her hands and told me that she started liking (I wonder - Another trap will surface soon) me after the meeting at CCD. According to her, I was innocent (in another words idiot/stupid/childish) enough to sit with a sex worker ( ;) I dint know until the waiter announced the news of sharing a table with a hooker otherwise it was out of question) in a public place. 

I inquired "Since when was she in this business?" She told that the day of our meeting was her first but last day. Then I asked the reason to choose such muddy business. She described her poverty and told that quick money was required to save her brother from the prison (WTF - Here comes the reason of liking me just in a meeting). The word prison started dancing in-front of my eyes. I could visualize her brother(like Sunny pa ji in hindi movies) holding the bars of cage and shouting “Koi mujhe yahan se nikalo.”

I was stunned, scared, terrified and startled. I never talked to guy who had a record of public fighting and here I was sitting next to a prostitute whose brother had been acquitted for one or more serious crimes. She told that her brother has been acquitted for Hit and Run case. She told that her brother's master, who was drunk and driving, has falsely implicated the crime on her brother. My mind was trying to figure out my involvement. What does she want from me? How can I help? Is she misunderstanding me with an advocate? Does she need money for trial?.

Instead of showing my impatient, I asked if I could be helpful. She said "I just wanted to meet and tell you about us and situation under which circumstances I accepted the muddy path. I will try to figure out the way to bring my brother back home." As an emotionless person, Instead of stretching my helping hand farther, I took the opportunity to run away from the situation so I finished my coffee and left her alone with her grief.

Again I forgot to mention, today was my birthday and My birthday gift was a kiss on my cheeks.

PS: If you do not know Kamini yet, Click here to meet her.

Disclaimer: All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.

Cafe Coffee Day: A close Encounter

Most Indian couples start their relationship with a cup of coffee. Initially to ease off an emergency situation; they prefer a coffee shop nearest to the girl’s house; and these couples find CCD as the most suitable outlet wrt their requirements (I think no of girls in a vicinity determines the no of CCD outlets. Mathematically it can be expressed as number of CCD outlets is equally proportional to number of gals living nearby.). That is why Cafe Coffee Day chain, the most popular coffee chain in India, can boast about maximum couples turning up to its outlets to enjoy their constructive / destructive (Depends on individual’s outlook) and peaceful time. 

The above stated reason understates the number of visitors at CCD. Apart from couples there are lot many people (Atheists only, rest go to temples and sing some Bollywood songs to persuade the deity) who come to CCD with their desires. As CCD chain has a bit catchy slogan "Anything can happen over a cup of coffee"; so it provides hopes for people searching for their counterparts. Lot of couples can be seen sipping their coffees in their own dreamy world, lot of couples can be seen entering or leaving the coffee parlour. So it is not hard to expect a miracle.

I always hoped, Someday CCD with live up to its slogan and image. Whenever I visit the parlour, I wished to bump into any girl from my past or future but luck never favoured me. One such day things took a U turn. I entered the CCD and inspected the people sitting around. Though things were not different from any other day@CCD but all of a sudden my scanning stopped at one table and my mind started finding the reason for her isolation. My mind started questioning "Why is she sitting alone? Is there someone who has gone to place the order?" But as I did not want to lose the empty table just next to her, so instead of risking the important time in analyzing the situation in broader manner, I reserved the table next to her.

I was checking her out and suddenly she peeked at me. As soon as she looked at me, one of my eye-lid blinked, due to one mosquito who sacrificed his life to make my life easier, in other words I winked. She stared at me, as if she was looking for an explanation. Wow, it was my chance, but I did not have enough courage to ask her if she wanted to join me. Dude, just in few seconds she joined me. I did not know why? I thought she was either desperate or bold to sit next to me. (Anyway Dil ki ichcha poori ho gayi)

During our conversation, I came to know her name was Kamini, what a lovely name, is not it? Her skin was pink and she was wearing yellow t-shirt with few silver lines which caused her skin glow more and a decent short (short enough to cover half of her thigh) skirt. She had put light red lipstick (I think it was light) on her lips and her face colour was fairer than skin colour due to a thin layer of powder on her face. Her eyes were dark black due to excess of Kajal and she had put a nice and huge nose ring. To describe her acutely, her looks were better than real Rakhi Sawant and worse than Karina Kapoor in Chameli.

Aroma@CCD was little different now, all boys were staring me and her interchangeably. Shit, men cannot change. These Guys, All of them were sitting with chicks but they had to check out my gal. But in contrast all the gals were also staring at me. Guess what, whenever I hang out with a girl then lot of chicks check me out. Why cannot they find me muscular when I walk alone?

Btw, I was not much cautious about Aam Aadmi and I was enjoying my first real encounter @ CCD . She was not notably good in speaking English, so to save her from embarrassment, I started talking in Hindi (Baaap re, bach gaye nahi to apni to ijjat hi chali jati). We covered lot of white areas e.g. movies, cricket, sport, and education, lot of black areas e.g. population, traffic, pollution, global warming and poor people and grey areas e.g. Indian politics, corruption, medicine, sex and prostitution. Usually discussion was healthy except in two instances. One, when we started the topic of sex, she became too touchy (Do not take it wrong, I just mean emotional) and another when I started protesting legalization of prostitution.

After finishing her coffee she announced the arrival of her boy friend. I was sad but I knew she must be waiting for someone. I asked her number and she denied. Anyway I waived a good bye and asked the waiter to bring the bill.

Waiter brought me the bill and I gave him the money. He returned with change and asked "How was the madam sir?” I told him to mind his business. He said "Arre sir kya sharma rahe ho bol bhi do? She will charge 2000 INR for one night." I was stunned and in the state of dilemma I whispered "Was she a whorrrre?" Waiter got angry and said “Sir Ijjat se bolo, call girl bolo”. I looked at all the people sitting around me, they were still staring at me and I was sweating in air conditioned mall. I asked the waiter, "Will she consider my CCD bill in her charges?" and instead of waiting for his answer I moved out of CCD briskly.

Disclaimer: All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.